My favorite dishless recipe

Okay here it is. The delicious dishless recipe you have all been waiting for.




Are you ready?





Are you sure?





Make sure now.





I wouldn't want it to sneak up on you.




Okay, here it is...





Delicious Salisbury Steak, almost fresh corn and nearly real mashed potato's.

Okay here are the directions:

Step 1 - Pre heat your oven to 350 degrees. (For an even quicker version this recipe can be done in the microwave but I think it is much better in the oven. I mean you COULD cook a turkey in the microwave but who would want to eat it that way?)

Step 2 - Take the meal out of the box.

Step 3 (and this is an important one) - Uncover ONLY the mashed potatoes, being careful not to uncover anything else. (I like to cut away the excess plastic so it doesn't some how accidentally lay back down on the potatoes)

Step 4 - Place the meals on a cookie sheet. (Don't worry, it won't get dirty so you won't have to wash it.
(Now I know what you are thinking, "Ew! That looks disgusting. Just wait. It will look amazing soon.)


Step 5 - Once the oven is pre-heated put the meals in the oven and set the timer between 25 to 28 minutes. I always choose 26 minutes and it is perfect but if you are at a different altitude the time may vary slightly.

Now there is a little waiting. What a great time to spend reading with the kids or planning your next family service project.

Okay so 26 (or so depending on your particular oven settings, altitude and air humidity) minutes later the timer will go off. Walla!
(Dude, it looks good right?)

Step 6 - Take the meals out (with a hot pad) and remove the rest of the plastic wrap. (Be especially careful not to burn yourself with escaping steam. It takes a bit of skill but I'm sure the more you make these you will get the hang of it.)

Step 7 - Serve!

(Okay well there is sort of a step 6 1/2. The box recommends that you let the meal sit for 2 minutes but I figure by the time kids wash up and you say the prayer, it's been at least two minutes.)

Ahhhh. Look at the happy faces.

And the best part is the clean up! Just one fork per meal to wash. (No pots, no pans, no bowls or plates. Just a clean kitchen.)

Oh! Oh! And another major bonus... it only cost one dollar per person. Yes, to feed all four of my kids cost $4. That isn't even on sale. That is full price. You find these babies on sale and you could really be saving a bundle.

They also come in a wide variety of entrees and side dishes, fried chicken, roast beef, turkey and gravy, chicken fried steak, really the list goes on and on.

So the next time you have three dance classes in one day followed by three parent teacher conferences (or whatever it is you do) be sure to make this fast and delicious DISHLESS meal!

Pots and Pans

Okay, so this was my kitchen Monday morning. No actually, this was my kitchen Monday morning AFTER I loaded the dishwasher. Notice the heaps of pots and pans that never fit in the dishwasher and I hate doing hand dishes.


See, Sunday I put some chicken in the crock pot on the right. I set it on high, put the lid on and went to church. Then I came home to realize that I never plugged the dang thing in. So after cooking it for a while in the crock pot (to make sure it was good and dirty. You know, really stuck on), I then decided it wasn't going to cook it fast enough so I put it in the big pot which is pictured here in the right sink.

After cooking the chicken I made the gravy in the big sauce pan in the left hand sink and added the chicken to that.

Then I started the rice in the rice cooker...which then died, mid-cooking. So I had to transfer the rice from that pot to a regular pot to finish cooking it.

The big silver bowl on the left is from making Muddy Buddies, a family favorite.

So here it is Tuesday and yes the pots are clean and put away. Yup I broke down and washed them by hand. But the sink is still full of dirty dishes. I am a load behind and I refuse to do two loads in a day. I have a fabulous meal planned Thursday however that doesn't hardly dirty any dishes, so I will be caught up by Friday. Hooray!

Pathetic.

Stay tuned for my delicious and dishless recipe I plan to make on Thursday!

Christians Football

I had planned at the beginning of the football season to organize a post about Christian and his amazing football team. The first game was a bit of a shocker to say the least. We showed up on the field to find the other team in shiny amazing costumes (Gary hates that I call them costumes), with several coaches taping ankles. They were like a pro football team. They even had cheerleaders! What the heck? (The cheerleaders did however struggle a little with some of their cheers referring to taking the ball down the court. Let's hope they figure it out before high school.)

Anyway, I quickly lost my excitement for the game when he spent about 3 minutes total on the field his first game. After speaking with his coach he did play more in subsequent games but his team struggled to say the least. I think it was about game 6 they made their first touchdown of the season. They would only make one more, but that one touchdown would win them their one and only victory.

Still he looks so grown up in all those pads.

There were actually TWO # 41's, but a mother knows her son... he is the one with the chicken legs.

Okay, here I am being an extremely devoted mother and watching the final game in the pouring rain. (I won't mention that I bailed about half way through to go to my friends and drink hot cocoa.) That umbrella has seen better days, and notice the phone stuck to me ear. Ya, that is me most of the time.

GO BENGALS!

Traffic School

A couple of weeks ago I was driving along minding my own business when this cop has the nerve to pull me over and give me a ticket. Okay, so I was speeding a little....barely....well, 42 in a 25. But it also happened to be in front of an elementary school so the officer thought it was important that I learn my lesson and give me a ticket. My saddest and biggest regret of the day was realizing about 5 minutes too late that I didn't get his picture for my blog. Oh man! A picture of us together... by the speed limit sign... him handing me my ticket... It could have been so great! But no, I had to be a lame brain and forget to snap a shot.

Luckily, here you have the option of going to traffic school. It cost about the same as a ticket but it doesn't go on your record and thus your car insurance can remain cheap. Well, cheaper than it would be with a ticket on your record.

So, Wednesday evening I had the amazing opportunity to go to traffic school. It was actually pretty fun, considering the alternatives I have for spending my time in the evenings. I agonized over the choices before me. Traffic school or refereeing my children's WWF smackdown contests? Traffic school or ironing Gary's umpteen-million shirts? Traffic school or doing the dishes from our Seven Course French Gourmet supper? Traffic school or having a ticket on my record and paying out the nose for insurance. Hmmmm... that's a tough one. I choose...

TRAFFIC SCHOOL!


I learned a lot of cool facts and met some very interesting people. Meet Sergeant Slaymaker. Dude, that seriously is his name! Perfect career choice hu?

This is the officer who taught the class. Bless his heart, this was a tough crowd. It was funny to see people arguing with him. And argue they did.

The biggest argument of the night seemed to be on the topic of traffic warnings. A majority of these people actually believed that traffic tickets should never be given, only a warning, to remind us to be safer drivers. What a novel idea! I think we should integrate this ideology into all our law enforcement:

"Mr. Anderson! Here you have killed yet another one of your wives. I'm going to let you off with a warning this time but I really don't want to see this kind of thing happen again".

One lady with huge hair and tight Wrangler jeans was very upset for getting caught in a pedestrian cross walk sting operation the police department set up on main street.

"I never seen no person crossing the street. I mean there was no person in sight! My mother is the worst backseat driver I know and she never seen no person. They say I was at fault but I never seen no person. They wouldn't even tell me where the person was because I never seen nobody!" (This is the shortened version. Just repeat it about 5 times and you get her side of the argument.)

Okay lady we got it. I think you should have a ticket on your grammar alone.

Then another guy who was missing most of his front teeth suddenly blurted out, "All I know is I was so grateful to the kind officer who gave me my ticket for only writin' me up for goin' 80 in a 60. I was actually goin' over 90 miles an hour. I was just racin' along and saw the cop on the side of the road. I just waved and pulled right over. That cop never even had to turn his lights on, I knew I was caught."

I'm thinking,"Dude! You're kidding right? Get tickets much?"

This same guy also volunteered the information that he has two DUI's and doesn't have to pay the extra insurance that officer Slaymaker says the state requires if you get a DUI. "Although, I do have to take a breathalyzer to even get my car to turn on." Man, he was a riot.

The presentation also included some graphic car wrecks from this area which were really cool. Cars torn in half and bursting into flames. Some of the slides were almost obscene and the stories certainly were graphic.

There was one lady who kept begging Sergeant Slaymaker to stop telling the stories because they were making her sick, but he just kept going. He said, "Hey! You think it makes you sick now? Wait till it's you lying on the road. Wait till this happens to you for real". She just kept putting her head down on the desk and moaning. "Ohhhhh, ohhhhh. I think I'm going to be sick. Ohhhh I feel like I'm going to pass out!" Dude. I just found the entire thing amusing. Surely I must be warped.

But here is my favorite slide. Yes, I took a picture just for you.

It's small but do you see it? GAS WAS $1.49 A GALLON!!! Ah, those were the days.

So if you ever get a ticket, first, don't forget to snap a picture of the officer and then I highly recommend attending traffic school. Sure, it's not for the faint of heart or weak stomach, but if you can handle it, it could really make your night! If nothing else at least it will boost your self esteem when you compare yourself to all the other losers there.

German Pancakes (AKA Dutch Babies)

This is such a simple recipe and looks really cool. When I was younger my aunt would make these in a 9x13 pan and the bottom would be a sort of egg custartd. I only liked to eat the fluffy curls so I found this recipe that is all golden curls of buttery pancake without the jello-ey egg stuff. Just look at the amazing picture. Oh yum!


First pre-heat your oven to 450 degrees.

Put 4 Tablespoons butter in 2 pie plates (2 Tbsp in each) and put them in the oven as it is preheating. (Once I left them a little too long and when I put the batter in the dish, it shattered so don't leave it too long)

6 eggs
1 cup milk
1 cup flour
1/2 tsp salt

Beat until fluffy and smooth with an electric mixer.

Pour half in one pie plate and half in the other. (I usually 1 and 1/2 the recipe to make 3 plates for my family.

Bake for 20 minutes.

Serve with warm syrup, jam, or fruit.



Notice only one of mine is a pie plate. One was a 8x8 square pan (on the left, notice the square curls) and the other is a deep dish pie plate.

Frequently Asked Questions

Most of you know that we have been having some reproductive challenges, and I get a lot of questions from well meaning friends inquiring after my abilities to procreate. Because I am soooo very popular and have tons of friends, this translates into being asked at least one of these questions on average every other day.

To be really honest, while I appreciate that people care about me and want to help, it gets old. This isn't exactly my most favorite subject. There are so many other things that I would love to talk about besides the inadequacy of my most private body parts, such as dance, politics, music, religion, favorite TV shows, books, and movies, gardening, the weather... you name it and I'll talk about it!

So, I thought it might save time for all of us if I just addressed all the questions in one place. This way when you see me, you can talk to me about something else besides the state of my uterus.


Basic Blunt Nosey Questions:


1. Are you pregnant yet?

Yes! I just found out today, and I'm telling you because we're such close friends! Please keep it to yourself though, because I don't want anyone else to know yet.


2. Really?

No. I was just yanking your chain.

3. Is there a reason you're wearing a baggy shirt today?

Ya! Because baby doll shirts are in style now. Because it's hot and I need a little breeze. Because I am tired of wearing the same 5 fitted shirts I own just so people will stop asking this question!

4. Are you still trying?

Trying what?


5. Are you still trying to get pregnant?


Yup. Next?


6. Are you able to get pregnant?


What, you think I found my other four kids under a rock?

Simple Solutions


7. You know you can go to a doctor for that?

Really? Thanks -- I never thought of that!


8. I have a great doctor you should go see.

You and everyone else. Take a number, I can only afford so many co-payments per month!


9. You do know how it's done, don't you? :nervous laughter:

Well, I thought so... but maybe we've been going about it all wrong. How about you walk us through it?

10. You know that you shouldn't do it everyday, don't you?

Oh. Gary will be so disappointed. Do you want to be the one to break it to him?


11. Has Gary been tested?

Booyah! Rest assured that Gary is, as they say, A STUD.


12. Have you checked your hormones/thyroid/liver function/gall bladder/big toe?

Yes. All that and more.

13. Have you asked your doctor if you need to gain weight?

Yes. I hate this question. My doctor has confirmed that I am at a normal, healthy weight.

14. Is it because you exercise too much?

Would you believe my doctor actually wants me to pick up another form of exercise on the days I am not teaching dance? This is true. He seems to think exercise is good for you. I teach children, it's not like I am running marathons. (While people I know actually do run marathons and get pregnant. Go figure.)


15. Is it because you're too stressed out?

This is a possibility I have seriously considered. I am working on reducing my stress levels. Since it stresses me out when people ask me if I'm pregnant every other day, you could all help out with that particular stressor.


16. I've heard that the more you think about it the more your body fights it. Maybe you should just stop trying and it will happen.


Stop trying? Well that's no fun for anybody.

17. Are you taking vitamins? Do you eat a healthy diet?

Yes and yes. My doctor suggested I might want to cut back on the alcohol and cocaine, but I think he's overreacting. You know how those medical types are.

18. Have you tried herbs/aspirin/getting drunk/drug trials/the latest greatest thing?

This is me just staring at you. Not in a mean way, like an evil glare or anything just...passing on that particular question.

19. Do you eat a lot of chocolate? (rumor has is caffeine in chocolate can be bad for pregnancy.)

Can you believe I don't really even like chocolate. Oh wait! Do tootsie rolls count?

20. Do you know that you should stack pillows and have your hips higher than your head after doing it?

Absolutely! Every night (or rather every other night--refer to question #13) after doing the deed, I stand on my head for 30 minutes. Is that enough information?

Again, I realize that my friends and family mean well and want to help. Individually I appreciate every inquiry into my well being but as a whole, I am sick to death of talking about it. I tried to have fun with this, and I hope no one is offended by my weird sense of humor. If I can't laugh about it I'll cry, and I'm sick to death of doing that too.

Any more question? Please feel free to leave them in the comment section below and I will be sure to answer them in a timely manner. Right after I finish standing on my head, of course.

Wonder Woman is laid to rest.

Okay, I've had a couple of friends express concern that I have not posted in a while. I used to post several times a week and now....not so much.

Well here is the reason.

I am a person that runs off anxiety. I can't sleep, I can't sit still, my mind and body race both day and night. This is a very productive way to live, because I get by on as little as 3 hours of sleep and still feel great the next day. During the time that most people waste on sleep, I am cleaning, blogging, reading, paying bills, working on dances, and doing anything else that needs doing. (And no. I am not one of those MethMoms. !)


The down side to all this anxiety and useful productivity is that I tend be overly emotional and highly irritable. I become more demanding and want to bite everyone's head off. Hm. Imagine that.


This summer my anxiety seemed to be at its worst. I was very productive, but I was also very stressed out. I know this isn't a healthy way to live, and it's not something I chose, my body just chose it for me. So, during the summer I started working on my thought distortions. I realized I even had thought distortions. I took the Burns Depression Test and was shocked to learn that I was apparently extremely depressed. I also took the Burns Anxiety Test and found my anxiety level to be through the roof. That one was not as big a shocker, but I was somewhat alarmed at how very high I scored. Anyway, so I have been working on my thought distortions since then. This has been helping me sleep a little better at night and my anxiety started improving too.

Then recently, a favorite neighbor recommended that I take Melatonin to help with sleep. This idea of a natural remedy was enticing, because I don't like the way sleeping pills make me feel. I asked my doctor and he thought the Melatonin might actually help with the anxiety too. It seems to be working okay other than, now I am like normal people.


Agh!


So I am not racing a million miles an hour all day. I no longer have an extra 4 or 5 hours a night to be super productive and efficient. If I have a night where I don't sleep good, I pay for it the next day.


I am struggling to keep up with the cleaning, cooking, and laundry. Then of coarse there is the 8 dance classes I teach each week, the costumes I have to plan, the dances I have to choreograph, the recital I have to pull off. Don't forget the children one on one time, hubby time, and what ever happened to personal time? Oh! And I started a garden this year for the first time...although it really isn't too much work. Still, I am just having a hard time keeping up suddenly. I have to live like normal people and I am used to living like Wonder Woman.


So in the adjustment, a few things had to take a back seat. My kids still want dinner (imagine that) , people keep wearing clothes that need washing and my dance students keep showing up at my house so blogging got the boot.

I really love blogging. I want to blog. I think of blog posts often, but I just don't have the time to pull it all together and get it done. Dance sort of runs me over this time of year. This is when I have to get all the costumes done for the whole year. I have to finish up the dances I haven't finished choreographing yet. I already need to start cutting music for spring and choreographing those dances. Teaching dance is something I love but admittedly, it is extremely stressful.

Okay, so in all, my message is this. I am good! I am fine! I am adjusting to just feeling like everyone else and still wondering if this is how everyone else feels. Maybe the Melatonin is not quite right. I don't know. I'm still figuring it all out. Don't show up to help clean my house or make me dinner. I have it under control, I just don't have time for blogging. In fact I am working on a really funny post that will be out as soon as I have a second to make it really great.

Okay so my kids are having a nervous break down that I am on the computer. Blog away. I still check in to read your blogs now and again. I love your blogs. Keep posting...for me.